A Fork in the Road Outtakes
by jane-with-a-y
Summary: Outtakes and future-takes from AFITR  Now in a separate story so I can add new ones from time to time!
1. Anatomy of a zipper first outtake

**A/N** : **Meh-don't get too excited. This was an outtake I wrote ages ago and was first published in AFITR. Somehow I forgot to add it when I started the outtakes story. Hey-for those of you who may have not been able to open the epilogue it is now up and running!**

_Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But I do own an Edward Cullen Barbie doll. He sleeps with my collection of antique china Head dolls in a crib that was made by the Shakers. This is weird in and of itself, but even more bizarre is that my dolls all had painted on smiles and now they have teeth. Huh._

**Thanks to colleen561 for being an awesome beta!**

**Fluff alert ahead. You have been warned.**

Anatomy of a zipper

Or

What REALLY happened in the Janitor's Closet?

BPOV

I opened the door to the janitor's closet as quietly as I possibly could. I knew that vamp-man would be able to see and smell me…but half the fun was pretending that he couldn't. So imagine my astonishment when I snuck in and saw him crouching in the corner with his back half turned to me. The dim light from the crack in the door allowed me to see that his eyes were closed tightly, as if he was debating his next move. I shut the door quickly, went to him, and whispered "gotcha" in his ear. He let out a sound that was half words and half moan…I think he said, "Yes, you've got me alright," or something to that effect.

He stood up, turned around, lifted me up, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me with a fiery passion. His kisses were hard and frantic. He was panting and moaning as I slid down the long length of his body and he lowered me to floor, slowly removing my red shorts, and taking my blue panties with them in the process. I heard his breath draw in sharply as he released me long enough to pick up my underwear and stuff them quickly in his pocket.

"Huh…you little panty thief!" I exclaimed. It wasn't the first time he'd done this either. I had begun to think that he had a bit of a panty fetish.

"I don't know why you bother wearing them, Bella. You know I'm just going to add them to my collection," he teased as he removed my shirt and bra. He stopped when he noticed that I was wearing the lace demi-cup gel bra that Alice and Rose bought me a few weeks ago. Yeah, Baby…I'm wearing THAT bra! His eyes widened when he made the connection, and he looked at me with wild, hooded eyes.

"Trade you…" he murmured in a shaky whisper.

Huh?

"Trade me, what?" I asked as I removed what was left of his khaki pants. My, my…he had certainly destroyed the zipper on those slacks!

"Bella…pleeeease…I'll give you back your panties…but please let me have this bra," he pleaded hotly in my ear, forcing me to shiver. He chuckled darkly. I looked at him with wide eyes; what happened to my bashful boyfriend? Not that I'm complaining mind you.

"You little perv…I knew you were a big old Victor…"

"Edwardian," he corrected me as he silenced me with a kiss.

I moaned into his mouth.

"We can barter later," he continued, his voice rough as his scent filled the room…oh, so good!

I kissed him back softly, as my mouth searched his ear, and I ran my wet tongue along its outer shell. I blew into it hotly, and he grabbed my bottom and braced me against the wall. I felt his erection pulsing and cold next to my thigh. I was so wet by this point that my thighs were dripping.

I thought that shit only happened in fanfiction. My mistake…

"Mmm…Bella…want you…need you…NOW," he said as he entered me with one fluid thrust. I was so turned on that I felt myself contracting immediately and within seconds I came so hard that I swear I saw stars. My reaction to his entry caused him to let out a sharp hiss and I felt him suddenly harden as he pulsed and climaxed forcefully…the icy coolness of his release made me gasp. Before I'd even had a chance to gather my wits about me and laugh over our mutual spontaneous combustions, I felt him harden inside of me again.

Huh?

Within moments he resumed his thrusting…long, deep, and so damn good that I felt the coil of desire threaten to unravel yet again. I gasped against his neck.

"Oooh…Edward…how can you be ready so soon? Mmmm…didn't you _jus_t…come?" I panted against him as he rocked his hips against my pelvis. He moved his hand between us and rubbed my, er, _you know what_... with one long, cool finger. And that's all it took…I yelled out his name as my climax washed over me.

"Mmm…sweetheart…you have to remember that I'm a vampire. I NEVER get soft, LOVE. I can do this…" he said, swiveling his hips while thrusting into me in rapid fire strokes… "All. Day. Long." He pounded into me word by word… literally driving his point home. Ungh…so GOOD!

I grabbed his backside as hard as I could and squeezed his ass with both my hands, drawing him in deeper. I heard his gasp as I clenched my walls around him as hard as I could. I could feel him tensing and throbbing inside of me.

"That's it, baby…oh, God…you feel so good inside my…

_PUSSY_."

Okay, I admit it…I BLUSHED. I think it was the first time I had ever used that word, and honestly, I think it shocked him senseless. He went completely still for a moment. I looked up to see his eyes; they were wild with need and desire. I heard him let out a short huff, and then he arched his back and buried his face in my neck and _growled._

_Yeah...he_ actually_ GROWLED!_

"Ungh…your sweet, hot little PUSSY…mmm…I LOVE that word…" he groaned as he came inside of me with a gasp.

Apparently that particular word had really shaken him up, because when he climaxed he lost both his footing AND his balance. This caused us to knock hard against the nearby drum of hand detergent, and over it went; the pink goo came gushing out, coating his feet.

"Ooof…" he yelled as he tried to hold onto me for dear life; his feet and legs danced on the tiles like he was doing an Irish jig. If I hadn't been so sure we were gonna crash and burn it would have been comical.

"Ow!" I yelped as we hit the floor with a thud. He looked at me in astonishment…I don't think Mr. Perfect had ever had a clumsy moment in his entire existence.

"Wha-what happened, Bella?" he asked, perplexed, as I burst out laughing.

"You fell hard…" I explained.

He looked at me with a mixture of mischief and love, and his face lit up with a big smile.

"You _bet _I did…" he muttered, as his lips captured mine once more.

**A/N: Some of you actually received an unbeta'd copy of this for participating in the "What year was the expression Knocked Up first used," contest I had a while back. Here's the answer for those who like a little history with their fluff:**

_**According to the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang, the phrase "knocked up," meaning pregnant, first appeared in print in 1830! An 1860 slang dictionary defined the term this way: "Knocked up. … In the United States, amongst females, the phrase is equivalent to being enceinte." The Oxford English Dictionary traces the expression back as far as 1813 and says it's of American origin.**_

**So now ya know the rest of the story, Paul Harvey.**

**Okay, so now **_**I**_** am the one who is blushing. I NEVAH use the P word in my stories. Yeah..the girl who writes M FF and who loves the F word cannot abide the word pu... You have NO idea how I argued with Bella over this one. Girl is wearing a thong in the epilogue...for all of eternity. Happy wedgie, bitch.**


	2. Post Card From Isle Esme BPOV

Dear Readers, I have decided to remove the outtakes and the letter from Charlie and submit them as a separate story. The epilogue will be posted with the original story. Thank you for your patience and your support. It isn't easy letting these two go, but I know it has to be done. I am hoping the epilogue will post within a week or two, real life permitting. A letter to Charlie from a wedding guest is ready to post as soon as I send it to Coleen for a final edit. Jayne XO!

Post card from Isle Esme

From Bella

If anyone had told me two years ago when I left Phoenix that I would be sitting on a beach watching porpoises frolic and cavort with my _husband_, I would have laughed myself silly. And if anyone had told me that said husband would have been born in 1901, changed into a vampire in 1918,_ and_ that I was going to become a vampire myself, well, I probably would have reached for the phone, dialed 911, and asked for the name of a good therapist.

But that is exactly what happened.

How a shy, awkward girl from Arizona ever managed to become part of a supernatural love story is beyond me.

But I did.

The day that we were married was a culmination of everything that Edward and I had been through in the past two years. Every tear we shed, every laugh we shared, every fight we fought, every step we took, led us to that day. It was an emotional journey that was paved with laughter and tears.

The road we traveled on was fraught with twists, turns, bumps, and finally, a fork in the road, which might have divided us forever.

But it didn't.

I scan the water, and my eyes gaze upon this beautiful man whom I now call husband, and I smile. His fair skin sparkles brilliantly in the sun as he calls out my name and playfully beckons me to join him in the gentle surf. His laughter and silly cries for me to get my _sweet ass in the water right the fuck now_ makes me laugh, yet gives me pause; could this happy and carefree man really be the same lonely and bitter vampire I once knew? My heart fills with love when I catch the glint of his gold wedding band in the hot Brazilian sunshine. The glitter of gold arcs over the surf of the azure water, and its brilliant ray reaches out to join with the band on my own hand as I walk towards him.

I wade through the foamy waters and watch as he disappears into the waves. I giggle delightedly when I feel his strong arms suddenly scoop me up and toss me into the air. He catches me before I hit the water, and wraps my legs around his waist. We kiss and do dirty, dirty things to each other beneath the waves; things that would make the fish blush, if that were even possible.

Have I ever been this happy?

Has he?

The answer to both is no.

This past week has been the happiest of my life, and according to him, the happiest in all of his existence.

When we arrived on Isle Esme last week, it was late at night. I had no idea where we were going on our honeymoon, and frankly, I didn't really care. All I wanted was to have some private time away from the prying eyes of Charlie and the vampiric hearing of his family so we could finally breathe and enjoy each other completely without restraint. This past year, while wonderful in many ways, was also quite stressful. Edward had a hard time learning to control the passion and lust that we had unleashed when we made love for the first time last fall. And, if I were to be completely honest, I also had a hard time controlling my own passion and lust.

But we now have four blissful weeks to ourselves, and I plan on making the most of them!

When our plane landed in Brazil last week, I was pleasantly surprised. Edward never mentioned South America to me as a place that held any significance to him, and I was shocked when he admitted to me that it was one of his favorite places to holiday. There seemed to be such a high energy with the people of Rio de Janeiro. And even though it was safe for him to walk openly amongst the people at night, I knew enough about Brazil to know that it was going to be sunny. I wondered how my sparkling boy was going to manage to tone that number down. I don't think they make an SPF strong enough to block his sparkles!

As our cab wove its way through the dancing and laughing crowd, I couldn't imagine my quiet and somewhat reserved husband wanting to be a part of this experience. I mean Edward knows how to let go, he's proved that to me often enough over the last few months. But in public? Er, NO.

Well, as it turns out, my new husband is full of surprises…

Edward demanded that the driver let us out on the curb and instructed him to take our luggage to the pier. I was confused by this, and as we wound our way through the flock of olive skinned couples who danced seductively to the beat of the Latin music, I became even more confounded. Edward swept me into his arms and expertly led me into one of the most erotic dances of my life. His face was alight with sheer happiness, and he laughed aloud as he tossed and twirled me about, bumping and grinding his hips to the sway of the music. I shook my head in amazement when he threw his head back and laughed, _really laughed_, while the crowd cheered us on. Even though I was a little embarrassed to be dancing like that in public, it was totally worth it to see Edward so damn happy!

Afterwards, we walked through the bustling streets of Rio. We stopped occasionally to admire the whitewashed stalls where artists and craftsmen sold their wares. Edward bought me a beautiful silver and turquoise bracelet from a dark haired man who winked at us both when Edward put his finger over my lips to shush me when I tried to protest.

"No Bella," he said, "I'm your husband now, and it's well within my rights to spoil you a little bit."

I closed my mouth over his fingertips, and he groaned softly.

"Save something for the honeymoon, Mrs. Cullen," he teased in an exaggeration of Emmett's voice.

My cheeks reddened when the vendor chuckled and wagged his eyebrows. Ignoring the merchant, I shook my head and laughed up at him, saying, "I thought we _were_ on our honeymoon baby."

He chuckled darkly at my words and pressed his mouth to my ear, saying, "Oh, Bella…this isn't even the _foreplay_ to our honeymoon." I remember how he ran his cold, wet tongue over the shell of my ear, and I'd felt my insides quiver in anticipation. "You'll see…" he promised as he steered me through the throngs of people dancing in the street.

We walked the short distance to the pier, and Edward went over to the guard to retrieve our waiting suitcases and bags. I heard him speak to the man in perfect Portuguese, and I nearly swooned from his words. Not that I understood anything he said mind you.

He took my hand and helped me climb aboard an absolutely gorgeous motorboat. I giggled when I saw the name of the vessel: _The Other Woman_. The dark wood of the cruiser gleamed in the moonlight as he secured the luggage into the aft. Once we were settled, he started the engine, and we both smiled as it purred to life. I felt the excitement spread through my body as he maneuvered the craft expertly through the gentle waters. I kept looking at his biceps flex powerfully underneath his blue linen shirt. Gah! Just when I thought the man could not possibly get any sexier…Phew! Who knew Edward could drive a boat? Then again, what _couldn't _he do?

As we sped through the water, he finally relinquished his secret and told me that we were going to a small island that Carlisle had bought some years ago as a present for Esme. My breath caught in my lungs as my imagination grew ,and I swear I didn't release it until we arrived on the sandy beach a short while later.

When we secured the boat to the mooring, it was very dark, and at first I couldn't see much. However, the moon shone brightly, and someone had lit the torches that led the way from the beach to the cottage where we would be spending the next four weeks. I later found out that the housekeeper and his wife had done this for us. But that's another story.

Though my eyes acknowledged the loveliness of the cottage, my vision was obscured by the beauty of Edward's face as he swept me into his arms and carried me over the threshold. I barely noticed the exquisite tiled floors, coffered ceilings, lush plants, and wonderfully appointed furnishings, as he walked gracefully down the hall with me laughing in his arms. We entered a large bedroom that could only be called a magnificent wedding chamber. Hundreds of tiny candles winked at us teasingly as he put me down gently. I gasped out loud as I took in my surroundings. A huge teak bed with billowing clouds of white drapery dominated the center of the room, and I gulped as I touched the gossamer fabric and gathered it between my fingers.

The doors that led to a private beach were open wide, and the room was filled with the sound of the surf and further illuminated by the glow of the moon.

Edward looked down at his feet for a moment and asked me if I wanted to go for a swim. His voice cracked and the pitch was higher than normal; I almost laughed at the sound. But then I saw his face when he looked up, and the laughter died in my throat. He was so incredibly _dear _to me in that precise moment. Edward was rarely nervous and seldom ever awkward in my presence. I watched him swallow thickly, and I felt that familiar ache stir between my thighs. Suddenly, I was overcome with love and shyness.

This felt different… Yet, it felt familiar too. It felt…it felt like _our first time_…

I was beginning to feel a little anxious, so I told him that I would love to go for a swim but needed a few human moments first. Why we had both felt suddenly bashful when we had been intimate for months, was a mystery to me. Maybe it finally occurred to us that this night _was_ different, because we were now truly going to become one as _husband and wife_… Catching each other's matching expressions, we both let out a little laugh before I walked to the bathroom to freshen up, and he headed out to the beach. I stopped and watched as he tugged the shirt out of his slacks, pulled it over his head, and tossed it on the sand. He turned around, and caught my stare. I blushed when I saw his knowing smile in the moonlight, and flushed even further when he licked his lips seductively.

Too quick for my eyes to process, I was suddenly caught in his cool embrace as he held me next to his chest and pressed his mouth to my forehead.

"Don't take too long, Mrs. Cullen," he said to me quietly. We both chuckled at my new name when it fell from his lips. But there'd been such a sweet shyness about it too. We'd stood there for a few moments just breathing the night air and each other in. He released me with a sigh, and headed back outdoors.

I sigh now in remembrance. It couldn't have been anymore perfect than if it had been a Lifetime original movie, with a Hallmark commercial thrown in for good measure.

After my human moment, I joined him on the beach. He was already in the water, and I waded out to him, knowing that he knew I was there even though his face was turned away from me. My tattletale heartbeat gave me away every time.

He turned to look at me then, and I gasped when I saw the profile of his perfect face. In this moment I was certain more than ever that he was more angel than man; he was absolutely stunning in the moonlight. He stood there silently for several minutes then quietly turned to me and told me in a husky whisper that I was beautiful. I touched the side of his face and trailed my hand down his neck, and he pulled me into his arms and held me close to his body. Even though the water lapped around us gently, I could feel every inch of him as he held me firmly against his body. I wrapped my legs around his waist and his long hands grasped my bottom. He squeezed my rear end softly and uttered a long groan into my hair. It was such an intense moment; I felt my eyes fill with tears as I touched his cheek and looked into his golden eyes. In spite of all odds, we now truly belonged to each other.

We floated out to the deeper part of the sea in each other's arms. It was dreamy and surreal, and _oh, so very perfect_. We were as quiet as the night itself; there was no need for words. We kissed each other for what felt like hours and let the water rock us gently; cradling us in its warm waves.

Only after I began to shiver, did Edward begin the journey back to the beach. He carried me swiftly into the cottage and into the bedroom, where he toweled us both dry and brought me over to the bed.

We kissed each other in various ways; gentle, passionate, tongue, teeth (well, _my t_eeth) nipping playfully… it was wonderful! Edward never took his eyes off me even when his mouth began to roam down towards my breasts. I waited for the whimper and was not disappointed when I heard it a few seconds later as he buried his face between my breasts. This was his little thing, and I loved knowing that it was only my body that would cause him to have this response.

We made love to each other slowly, never rushing, but taking the time to worship each other in ways that seemed familiar, but somehow felt completely different. At one point, Edward sat us up facing each other; he was still deep inside my body, thrusting gently, yet deliberately. I sigh again when I remember the look on his face when he told me that making love as husband and wife felt more and meant more than he thought it would. I knew exactly what he saying to me because I could feel the change as well. It was as if everything we shared before this night, wonderful though it had been, was eclipsed by the magnitude of knowing that we were now each other's completely.

"My wife," he kept murmuring as he laid me back down, and secured his hand on the headboard. He thrust into me harder than he ever had dared before, and was inside of me so deep, and pressed against me so close, that I couldn't tell where he began or I ended.

I looked into his eyes, and for a moment, just a tiny fragment of a moment really; I thought I saw a flash of leaf green pass over his eyes. _Teddy…_

I grabbed hold of his chin, kissed his soft lips, and gasped his name out loud. He pulsed inside of me, and I felt his fluid as he came shouting my name.

"_Bella… MINE… Oh God, I love you so much!"_

I came so hard that I couldn't even manage a moan, let alone a scream, it was that intense.

(Cuz even though I don't like controlling boyfriends, er, husbands, I DO like it when Edward gets all possessive-acting during sex and yells, "MINE!" Don't judge…)

His hips continued to gently, yet firmly, thrust into me; his arousal was still evident. I finally found my voice and groaned loudly when I saw his face. His lips were parted and his nostrils flared, and I watched in fascination as his eyes closed, then suddenly opened. They were black as pitch and hooded with lust. He gripped the headboard hard, threw his head back, and let out ferocious growl. His release was cool and seemed to last forever.

I didn't have anything better to do so, yeah, I came again. (Insert self-satisfied, yet slightly sheepish grin, here.)

Finally, Edward let out a huge sigh of satisfaction and collapsed with a loud thud by my side.

And the headboard also collapsed… with a loud thud, to the floor.

We looked at each other in amazement.

Huh…

"Oopsie"

I burst into giggles and had to make a dash to the bathroom before I embarrassed myself. _Oopsie…_where did my anxious, worried, and overly dramatic vampire go? If this had happened the first time we made love he would have been beside himself.

When I came back to bed, I told him that I thought I saw a glimpse of Teddy, but he only laughed at me saying, "That was all me, Bella…I told you I can go on forever. Want me to prove it?"

And he did…four more times.

It had been a wonderful night, one that was filled with more laughter and love than we'd ever imagined or dared to hope for. I like to think that all those months of practice gave him confidence and freed him from any worries or fears that he would hurt me. Plus all that practice, yeah, that was totally hot!

My mind begins to drift as we continue to float in the water and now I start to wonder what sex will be like when he finally changes me next year. I'll bet it will be hot and needy and primal. And I can't wait to find out!

I feel a rush of warmth as desire floods my body. Suddenly, all I can think about it sex, sex, and more sex. (Pardon me…but I AM on my honeymoon here. Don't judge.)

Remember the time he pressed me against my truck, and we dry humped, er, _frottaged_?

I thought then that it was the single most erotic moment of my life.

And it was.

But _that_ feeling…

The coil that grew tauter and tauter till it finally broke and spun out of control?

Well guess what?

It happens

Every.

Single.

Time.

(And yes, my vampire is STILL sexy as_ fuck!)_

Just thinking about all of this makes me groan, and I watch with delight as his nose twitches lightly, indicating that he smells my arousal. He gives me a lascivious wink, and his lips curl into that familiar smirk that I love so well. He throws his head back and laughs when I stick out my tongue at him in return.

Realizing once again how open and just plain joyous he has become over the last year, fills me with love and pride for us both. He finally managed to put aside his past, faced his personal demons, and has embraced the idea of a vampiric future with me at his side for all of eternity.

I like to think that maybe, just maybe, I had a little bit to do with all that.

Well, me and Dr. Phil.

We watch that show together every afternoon at four o clock. Edward likes to mock him, but I know he listens carefully when the good doctor has shows about domestic issues. A few weeks ago we watched a show about Obsessive Compulsive Disorders and Edward suddenly looked at me and asked if I thought he was OCD. I glanced at his music and DVD collection on the shelf and shook my head no. (Hey…the man is over a hundred years old and no medication would work for him anyway.) Honestly, if Dr. Phil has taught me anything over the years it's to learn how to pick my battles. Now if he ever airs a show about controlling boyfriends with commitment issues, I might need to point out to Edward just how much he has grown (insert feel good about yourself psycho-babble-here) over the last year.

Grinning mischievously, I reach over and playfully press his belly button. He lets out a little giggle, and I'd die a thousand deaths just to hear him make that happy sound again.

"Ding-Dong!" I say as I push against his navel (he's an outtie in case you were wondering. So cute!)

"Who's there?" he giggles.

"It's Miss Swan. Can Mr. Masen please come out to play?"

"Why yes, I believe he can, love. What's it to be today…Hide and Seek, Mother may I, or a good old fashioned round of _Doctor_?"

"Well, you do have TWO degrees in medicine, Doc," I sing to him.

"Yes, _yes I do_. So then, Doctor it is… Shall I be the ever so proper, yet secretly dirty, Edwardian Doctor Masen? Or would you prefer the more laid back, yet slightly pervy, modern day Doctor Edward…?"

"Surprise me."

He throws me over his shoulder, and I settle happily on his back as we swim towards the shore laughing and tickling each other. He grabs my behind and gives me a playful pinch, and I give his front a playful pinch in return.

Hmm…I've got a few new games for Mr. Masen to play if he's up for it… And judging from the bulge in Edward's swim trunks I'd say he's up for anything.


	3. Post Card from the Edge EPOV

Post Card from the Edge

From Edward

I'm sitting on a sand dune watching Bella frolic with a dolphin named Fred. We'd met him yesterday when we were in the water together, er, _frolicking_ with each other. Bella had just wrapped those long legs of hers around my waist when I felt a nudge on my hip. I chuckled and whispered to her that I was trying to get it in and that she needed to stop being so impatient (I mean the waves were getting a bit rough, but then so was she. It isn't as easy for me to concentrate as it used to be…aggressive wives can be very, er, distracting.)

In any event, when I felt the nudge move up my back and shove me, I'd nearly lost my footing. I looked up in surprise to see that a third party had decided to join our private interlude in the Atlantic! Bella had burst out laughing when the dolphin's head rose over my shoulder and spewed a snout full of sea water in my face. I admit I was shocked; animals rarely ever come within ten feet of me willingly. Bella later remarked in a droll voice that it was a good thing it hadn't been a shark. Anyway, within a few minutes of his introduction, Bella had named him Fred and he has become her new "pet."

"No Fred! Let me get on _your_ back this time!" I hear her admonish the poor creature. Poor old Fred is going to be positively exhausted by the end of our honeymoon, if Bella has anything to say about it. I mean, the woman acts like she is auditioning for a job at Sea World.

Okay, I know I sound like I am sulking. I know I shouldn't be jealous over a fish, er, mammal. But honestly, it should be _my_ back she wants to ride on, and me she wants to toss and tumble in the sea with and not some damn Flipper wannabe named…_Fred_.

"Bella, Love…it's almost time for lunch. Why don't you let poor Fred go home to Mrs. Fred for the rest of the afternoon and give it a rest?" I call out to her in vain.

"No, I'm not ready yet! I still have to master standing up on his back with one leg."

One leg?

If you recall what a clumsy girl my wife is on dry land, then you will appreciate the irony of this scene. Apparently this clumsiness does not exist in the water however. The woman could have taught Esther Williams a few moves.

"Yeees!"

I look up to see my bride achieve her dream, as she stands on Fred's back with one leg poised high in the air. Her tiny bikini bottoms reveal a bit of her smooth white bottom as the fabric rides up to expose a bit of cheek. She is getting as brown as a berry in the Brazilian sun, and I can't wait till this evening when she'll stand in front of the bathroom mirror following her shower judging the depth of her "tan lines."

"Look how dark I'm getting, Edward!" she'll say tonight as she compares the amber skin above and below her creamy white breasts. Ungh!

Okay, that does it…I stand up, hard as a rock, and run towards the sea. Fred takes one look at my determined stride, and I give him my best vampire glare. He looks at me with that ridiculous dolphin grin, laughs, and with a big water spurt in my direction, he drops Bella unceremoniously into the waves and swims off into the deeper seas.

"Shit!" Bella bobs up to the surface sputtering, and I wade out towards her with a smirk and a chuckle.

"You did that on purpose, Edward!" she mutters angrily.

She's pissed.

I love that I made her pissed.

"Aw, come on, baby…" I cajole in a sexy voice. I lower my lashes as I finally reach her and wrap my arms around her hips and pull her towards me. "Don't be mad, Sugar. It's just that I've missed you so much…"

"_Baby_? _Sugar_? Is that really coming out of your Victorian mouth, _darling_?" she asks with an incredulous face.

Darling? Hmm…that's a new endearment, I think inwardly. I like it. A LOT!

Outwardly though, I sigh. "Bella, how many times have I told you that I am Edwardian and not Victorian?" I pretend to be hurt and give her my best pout and rest my head on her shoulder. My fingers play with her wet curls, and I trail my nose to her ear and plant a soft kiss behind it. She shivers in response.

"I dunno, Mr. Calculator brain, you tell me. I'm sure you could crunch those numbers for me in ten seconds or less and give me an exact figure. Or are you keeping a tab?" She practically purrs. I don't think she's pissed at me anymore since her own hands are scraping lightly over my belly button. Oh, is she going to press it again? Umm…maybe it's time for Mr. Masen to make another appearance!

"I dunno, Love. My calculator brain appears to be stuck. Maybe you could press my button a little harder and release it?" I ask hopefully.

She lets out a sexy little moan and chuckles darkly. "Will you still be able to crunch my numbers if I do?" she asks.

Crunches… I'll show her some crunches!

I lift her up out of the water and toss her over my shoulder and with a powerful stride, I take us out of the ocean and march up to the house in record order. She's got a few buttons to press, and I've got some numbers to crunch.

"Have you come up with a number yet?" she groans as I settle her on the bed.

I place my mouth at her hip and using my teeth I carefully snip the tiny bow that holds her unbelievably miniscule bikini bottoms together. The bow falls to the floor, and I nudge the wet material away with my nose. I plant a kiss right at her center, and she lets out the most erotic little growl. My tongue darts out and licks her soft folds lightly.

"How does the number _sixty-nine_ sound?" I ask as I surrender myself to her hot arousal.

I've always been good with numbers.


	4. Letter from Charlie

_**Thank you to my beta coleen561 whose patience with me is worthy of a medal! As always I decided to tweak a few things so if there is a mistake, please blame ME and not Coleen! Note: there will be an author's note at the end of this outtake.**_

_**BTW...This is the letter that Charlie gives to Edward at the wedding reception (chapter 25) after he tells Edward that he knows about the Cullens, er, dietary needs. He asks Edward to give it to Bella when they are on their honeymoon.**_

Dear Bella,

If you are reading this letter from me, then I can only assume that Edward gave it to you and that you are on your honeymoon – destination unknown.

Except, it isn't unknown to me, kid, because there was no way on God's green earth I was letting you leave without knowing where you'd be. I may or may not have forced Edward last week into giving me at least a clue. (That kid sure does love his car!) For the record, I wouldn't really have keyed it; maybe just have had it impounded. Oh, well. It was fun getting him all worked up. I guess you can tell him the truth now, though. Oh, and also make sure to tell him that Alice had already told me where you guys were going a few weeks ago. Hah! I think I'm going to enjoy being a father-in-law after all.

Oh, Bella.

I have no idea what to say to you right now. (Shocker, I know, since I am normally so verbose. Hah, hah.) But I'm going to give it my best shot.

Okay.

I guess I should start off by telling you a little story. It might explain a lot to you, and possibly even to Edward, about a few things; namely why it is that I have been accepting of the Cullens and their little "secret."

Yes, Bella – I know.

Now before you fall apart, let me tell you my little tale, okay? It's a good one, I promise.

When I was about seventeen years old, I stayed with my grandmother Swan for two weeks at her home in Alaska. My grandfather had just died, and my parents asked me to visit her for a spell. Nana Swan was a very interesting woman, and it's a shame you never got to know her as she died before you were born. You would have loved her.

Anyway, while I was at her house, I decided to explore the woods that surround her property. My grandfather Swan had been an avid hunter in his youth, and I had inherited his shot gun. Even though I had no experience with big game and knew enough to know that this wasn't the time for me to learn, I decided to go anyway. I also knew that it was stupid and reckless to go hunting alone, but being just a kid, I did it anyway. It was in the early summer and the weather was surprisingly decent for that part of Alaska.

Did I mention the name of the town? Well, it was near the Denali National Park.

Yes, Denali. I know you're familiar with that town since I mailed several wedding invitations to that town last month.

Now, Bella, I know for a fact that you are a smart girl. You're a chip off the old block and would make an excellent cop yourself. I know that your wheels are already spinning with the mention of the name Denali. You are probably already forming a hundred different theories in that brilliant mind of yours. Right now, it's just a hunch. That hinky feeling in the back of your mind that tells you straight off that something's afoot? Yeah, I know all about that feeling, kid. I live with it every day. That's why I became a cop.

Anyway, I stayed in the woods the better part of the morning shooting and bagging rabbits and a few squirrels with my own rifle. But I got bored doing that pretty fast, so I decided to look for elk. My Grandmother had begged me not to shoot at anything larger than my fist, but I was dying to show off my hunting skills. Besides, I wanted to bring back the hide to prove myself to Billy and my other buddies on the rez. They were always so damn smug about their hunting skills. I thought I'd show them!

Now around this time, I heard a noise in the thicket that bordered on a small stream. I held my breath, and when I thought I saw the tips of antlers, I aimed my gun at the trees and fired.

Imagine my surprise when a beautiful woman with long reddish blond hair came storming at me from the direction I had shot at.

She was hands-down the prettiest gal I had ever laid eyes on in my life. I was so surprised that I dropped the rifle, and it discharged when it fell to the ground, and shot her in the chest. I fell to my knees and almost started to cry; I couldn't believe how careless and stupid I'd been. I figured that her life and my life were both over at this point, and I honestly didn't know what to do, but knew I had to do something. I started to get up and go to her when I felt a strong grasp on my arm. When I opened my eyes, it was her – the girl I had just shot! She took my grandfather's gun, popped out the ammo, and then snapped it neatly in half using her forefinger and her pinky. Then she threw her head back and laughed at me. I think my mouth was open wider than the Grand Canyon by that point. I figured that my mind was playing tricks on me, what with the shock of the gun firing and her still being alive and all that. I convinced myself that the gun was old and must have split apart after I shot at her.

She took my hands in hers and I forgot my own name. She had the prettiest eyes I'd ever seen – golden eyes.

She refused to tell me her name and told me just to call her T.

Now, I'm not going to go into all of the details about that day in this letter. It is a long story and I've never told anyone all of it, save one. I never even your mother. She would have been both jealous _and_ intrigued. Our entire marriage would have been spent with me either explaining myself or taking her camping in Alaska every damn weekend so she could snoop. No, thank you! I'm also reluctant to put anything down on paper that could end up biting me in the ass later on. Is that selfish of me? Probably, but I do have a reputation and a retirement to protect after all.

Anyway, I know it must be weird to think of your old man as a horny, love struck teenager, but you need to know this story because it'll help explain why I have the courage to let you marry Edward and possibly to let you go forever.

I hope I won't have to let you go forever, Bella.

T was what we used to call a man's woman. She took my hand, picked up the pieces of Grandpa's gun, and took me into the deeper part of the woods. She brought me to her special hunting grounds and helped me track down an elk, and then helped me clean him and prepare his hide.

It wasn't until I saw her licking her fingers afterwards, that I realized that there was something seriously wrong with this girl.

When she saw what must have looked like disgust and confusion cross my face, she distracted me by putting her mouth on mine and giving me my first real kiss. (Okay, I know you're thinking that I was a little old to receive my first kiss, but you have to understand I was a shy and awkward kid, much like you were when you first arrived in Forks.)

T told me that she lived with her two sisters and that they had a cabin not far from my grandparents. She made me close my eyes and tied a rag over them, making a game out of it all by leading me down a path blind-folded. To this day, I'll never know how I got there, but the wind was in my ears the whole time, and I swear I felt like I was flying as she ran and pulled me down the path and to her cabin.

We ended up staying there for the rest of the afternoon. Her sisters were also hunters, and she told me that they were in Canada on a long excursion. I couldn't believe she wasn't afraid to stay alone and told her so, but she only laughed at me and told me that she was the scariest thing lurking in these woods and not to worry about her. Then she lit a fire in the great room and the conversation and my worries ended right then and there. We sat and talked about everything under the sun. I have always been a quiet fellow, but for some reason I was different with her. The rest of the day passed in a blur. It didn't even seem real; I felt like I was part of a movie or some kind of an epic novel.

I'm not going to lie and tell you that I fell in love with T that afternoon in the Alaskan woods, although my seventeen year old heart certainly thought so at the time. I will say that it was the best day I had ever known in my life and it was one I knew I would never forget. I'd never met anyone like her before and I still haven't. I probably never will.

When twilight set in, I figured it was time for me to head back to Nana's house. T kissed me good bye and told me that I was the first boy she had ever been with who'd actually left her cottage alive. I teased her and asked if she was a "man-eater" and she chuckled and said, "Something like that." Her lips and skin were so damn cold, Bella, and you're probably wondering why I didn't notice all of that earlier. But then again, being a teenager yourself you might not wonder at all. Hormones will do that to a kid I guess; they have a heat all of their own.

I promised her that I wasn't going to be the kind of boy who would lead a girl on and then never see her again. I saw the look in her eyes when I said that to her; it was a mixture of sadness, regret, and possibly even love. Anyway, she laughed off my remark and told me that that was exactly how it would turn out to be, and sadly, she was at least partly right.

After a long and emotional goodbye, I finally left her and made my way back to Nana's house with a huge smile on my face. Of course Nana spotted that grin the second I entered the house. She asked me all about my day and wondered if I used my grandfather's rifle even though she'd asked me not to take it. I was ashamed when I told her that not only had I taken it, but that I'd broken it. Nana wasn't one to take things at face value. I guess we both now know where our suspicious and problem-solving mind comes from, huh?

She marched me out to the barn and demanded to see the gun and my prey. When she finished looking at both, she gave me a hard look and told me to get back to the house and that she wanted to have a talk with me.

I swear the FBI could have used Nana Swan at the helm. She had me singing like a canary before the tea kettle had even stopped whistling.

I told her everything: how I met T, thought I'd shot her, and how we spent the day together getting to know each other. (Well, I didn't tell her EVERYTHING. A boy's got a right to have some secrets after all.) But she knew.

She told me a story that night about three beautiful, motherless girls who never changed, who never grew old, who ate and drank only animal blood, and who were more dangerous to humans than any creature in all of Alaska and Canada combined.

"Cold ones" she called them.

Vampires.

I dismissed this idea with a roll of my eyes; _vampires_! I figured my Nana was off her rocker.

She told me I was lucky to still be alive and that according to legend, any man that spent time with these girls was never seen or heard from again. She told me that they lusted over young boys like me and that she was the hunter, and I had been the real prey. She made me promise I would stay away from the woods.

I didn't listen, of course.

She kept a close eye on me for the first few days that followed, but as soon as she slipped out to go to the market for groceries, I headed out to the woods to search for T.

She wasn't there, and unsurprisingly, I was unable to find the path that led to her cabin. I searched all day and into the night and went back every day after that, but I never saw her again.

When I returned to Forks, I was sick at heart to think that I had found the girl of my dreams only to never lay eyes on her again. I headed down to La Push to spend the following weekend with Billy. He knew right away that something big had gone down with me in Alaska. That night, over a case of Rainer that he'd pilfered from his cousin, I sat on the beach and spilled my guts. I'll never in a million years forget the look on his face when I told him, or his reaction which involved his throwing me to the ground and pinning me there as he told me what he knew about the Cold Ones. I shrugged him and the story off, and I threatened to tell his father about the girl he'd supposedly knocked up in town back in the fall. But that's another story.

Anyway, Billy and I made a pact that night that we would take our secrets to the grave. And I would have kept that secret till my death Bella.

But then you came along and fell in love with Edward Cullen. Suddenly, that promise didn't seem so important to me anymore.

I got over T in time, of course, though it wasn't easy. I told myself that it wasn't real and that it had all been a dream; a way of coping over the loss of my grandfather, whom I had loved. My grandmother died a few months later, and I never returned to Alaska again.

The following summer, after I graduated, I joined the Navy and met your mother in Newport, RI. The rest shall we say, is history.

But Bella, those stories about the Cullens and the Cold Ones? Well, I really didn't believe any of that until Edward Cullen came into your life.

When Edward arrived on the scene I began to notice his differences right off the bat. At first I tried to dismiss them as quirks and idiosyncrasies but after a few months I began putting two and two together. That's when I realized that you and I shared more in common than simple DNA. I knew what it was like to be over the moon over someone who may or may not be of this world. And even though the feelings that I felt that long ago June day were a mere shadow of the love you feel for Edward, I remember all too well the pain of losing it and never really finding it again; not even with your mother if I were to be completely honest.

But then I wouldn't have had you, Bella, and you are the most precious thing to me in this world. You're my baby girl. Don't ever forget that, honey.

And this is why I have to let you go, Bella. I know that if I were to try to stop you from marrying Edward, I would lose you forever. And I'd rather die than lose you, Bella. Not like that.

I went to see Billy tonight and told him to lay off you and Edward. I threatened to tell the rest of the tribe about his youthful indiscretion and also about the marijuana plants that grow behind the dunes of La Push in the same caves that their ancestors used for that purpose. (For the record, I've never seen them myself, which is why I've never had to act upon it.) But I know they exist, Bella, and I suppose for a cop that it in itself is bad enough. However, everyone needs to have a backup plan in life in case something goes wrong, and this was mine.

Billy made the changes to the treaty, and we made a vow to never speak of it again. He promised me that you would remain unharmed and that is enough for me.

Well, Bella, I must close this letter for now. I imagine Edward is going to be in for quite a shock when I tell him what I know. I think I'll have a little fun yanking his chain just a bit at your reception; I never could resist having the opportunity to be a know-it-all and a smart-ass. But then you already knew that about your old man.

Honey, whatever happens, please know that I will always love you. I have no idea how any of this is supposed to work, but I am going to do my best to talk to Edward and beg him to allow me to remain a part of your life in any capacity you are both comfortable with.

Don't worry about me too much. I have started dating Sue Clearwater (as I am sure you already know). While this isn't a fireworks and sparklers type of love, it is a comfortable campfire, and I wouldn't mind taking my shoes off and staying for a while. Possibly even for the rest of my life.

Have a wonderful time on your honeymoon, Bella, and we will have a good and long overdue talk about everything when you get back to Forks.

Love always,

Charlie

PS: Yes, I know you call me Charlie behind my back. I don't mind at all because in your heart I know you think of me as Dad. And that is good enough for me.


	5. Dear Charlie

**A/N: Dear readers-this is the long overdue letter to Charlie from a certain wedding guest. Enjoy**!

Dearest Charlie,

I saw you today at the wedding of Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan.

I was sitting in the front row with my two sisters, but you never noticed me. I was the girl in blue; the one with the long strawberry blonde hair. I thought I saw you cast your eyes on me for a moment, but convinced myself that I was mistaken. You never really saw me at all. Of course the last time you laid eyes on me I was a nineteen year old girl, and you were a seventeen year old boy.

The mind is a strange thing Charlie; it only sees what it wants to see. But of course as you are a police officer I am quite certain that you already know that to be true.

For you see, I am still a nineteen year old girl, Charlie, and I will always be.

It took everything in my power to keep my feelings at bay today. Although we have not seen each other in well over twenty years, and you are no longer the sweet, young boy whom I remember so clearly, I would have known you anywhere. Even with that comical looking mustache.

I recognized your scent.

It was so pungent and so gripping that I broke my sister Kate's hand when you walked past us towards the wedding alter. I struggled momentarily to rein my thoughts and my emotions in; Edward is very good at reading minds and was it not for the fact that he was preoccupied this evening, I am positive he would have read mine quite easily. I am not certain what his reaction would have been.

As such, I decided to re-direct my thoughts to that of a young man who was seated in the aisle across from us. I was told his name was Michael, and I spent the rest of the evening flirting and dancing with him. He was a sweet innocent boy, and I imagine I could have had some fun changing all that, but I didn't. He was not you.

Yes, Charlie, I am that girl you once knew only as T. I feel sure that you have not forgotten the day we spent together regardless of how many years have passed, or the fact that your human memories have no doubt dimmed considerably more than my own.

No boy forgets his first, do they? And I never forget anything.

I want you to know that the afternoon we spent together was perhaps the most wonderful day of my very long life. (And I prescribe to the adage that it is a woman's prerogative to keep her true age a secret.) Suffice to say that I have seen many Junes in my lifetime; more than you can fathom. But that particular June was special in so very many ways.

I have been with so many men over the years Charlie; more than any woman you have known or will ever know. I am not ashamed of this fact; I am, after all, an insatiable creature who has a voracious appetite that must be fed regularly and often. I hope that you understand and find it in your heart to forgive my passionate nature, as it has no bearing whatsoever on what transpired between us that day. My heart is separate entity from my desire after all.

Vampires only take minutes to fall in love, did you know that? And when they do it is permanent and complete, and they will never love another. It is part of the mating process, and it is one area of our being which we have no control.

I fell in love on that long ago June day with you, Charlie, and it happened within the first three minutes of our encounter.

I want you to know that it took everything in my will power not to bite you that day and keep you with me always. However, for the first time in my very long life I also felt the burden that comes with falling in love. I wanted only what was best for you, and until that day this was an unknown and rather terrifying experience for me. I have always been a selfish creature you see. I never felt the need to protect anyone; I never knew I was capable of feeling that way.

But I did.

And so I let you go.

Charlie, I want you to know that I heard you come back into the woods for me in the days that followed our encounter. I cannot shed actual tears but please know that my heart was breaking; I longed to run into your arms and never leave them. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.

When I saw you walk arm and arm with Bella towards her future husband this evening, I knew I had made the right decision. (Though I must say I do question your choice in women Charlie-isn't the woman who accompanied you connected to those vile shift shapers from the Quileute Tribe? Ah well, I suppose some men are always attracted to the wrong kind of woman. Sigh…)

I will remain that nineteen year old girl that you once knew for all of eternity. I will never get old, never sicken, and never die. You, however, will do all of these things just as you are meant to do. It is the game called life, and sooner or later everyone must play; everyone who is human, that is.

Please do not mourn for me; I am still a selfish creature who gets a thrill from the chase. I have a full and happy life. My sisters and I travel the world over, and I am never alone unless it by my own choosing. And although I was always told that true love can only occur to a vampire once in their existence my sister's new husband, Laurent, assures me that it is indeed possible for a person, such as me, to fall in love twice; it happened to him and Irina! I still have my doubts, however if there is one thing I have learned in this strange journey, it is to dispel belief and keep an open mind.

And heart.

You taught me that.

Please take care of yourself Charlie, and if it means anything to you at all, know that I will never regret, nor forget, you.

"T"

PS: I do think it is a strange occurrence that it is YOUR daughter who is now facing a future that literally means forever. Although I was never a believer in destiny per se, I'm beginning to alter my opinion. Surely she must be the reason our paths originally crossed on the fateful day in June all those moons ago. Whatever the reason, I assure you that I will do everything in my power to protect her and keep her safe should she ever find herself in a position that would require my assistance. Of course with Edward Cullen by her side it is doubtful that she would need my help, but it is my solemn vow to you nonetheless. You have a lovely daughter, Charlie, congratulations and welcome to the family. Tanya

PPS: Although I wrote this letter following Edward and Bella's wedding it has taken me months to find the courage to mail it to you. I hope that you will not mind my interference in your life by receiving this, as it was not meant to disrupt or cause a rift in your new relationship. If, however, you find yourself free of this attachment and would like to meet again then please let me know. My thoughts and feelings towards you have not changed; I don't believe they ever will. Tanya

**A/N: Yikes! Talk about a blast from the past. Now then-do you think Charlie (now in his early 40's) will dump poor Sue for the sexy, yet eternally 19 year old, Tanya? Could this be a sequel? Well, it could. But I doubt it. More likely a future take or two**!


End file.
